Awake last night until 3 am . . . not sure why [ LIE ] . . .sleep doesn't come lately since mom's been diagnosed with acute myloid leukemia.

Yesterday was a rich, filled-to-the-brim-joyous- yet-heartbreaking day . . . so most likely that kept me up.

Jay & I went to a charity bowling event from 9 am - 12 pm - proceeds to benefit local women's shelter. Had great fun, bowled terribly & didn't care, laughed & talked with friends; went out for lunch afterwards [hoping to have some great pictures, but I am too tired today to even attempt connecting camera to computer].

Then we went off to purchase a new mattress set for mom; her's was way too soft & possibly part of the back pain she's been having. I had noticed this while at her house - she no longer showers if alone - although we purchased the shower bench for her, she is too weak. Anyway, I was "spotting" her whiel she was in the shower and sat on the bed to watch TV, then laid down and went "WHOA, this mattress is terrible" . . . decided she needed a new one. Her comment was, "I'm not buying a new mattres set with 3-4 months of life left in me" *sob*

We got a great deal on the mattress set - - -when I explained to the sales lady we were buying it for my mother she took another $100 off the set PLUS the guy said he'd deliver later the same dayfor FREE. So off we went to mom's house to meet delivery guy. Jay I moved her old mattress so I'd have time to vacuum under her bed, etc.

Mom was soooooooo happy and it was a delight to watch her try it out! We stayed until about 6 pm. My sister was there as she spends the weekends with mom to cook & be with her. It was good to see my sister, however, after about 2 hours she started with her comments about black people, gays, all laced with profanity.

I have many gay friends and black friends and I REFUSE to participate or listen to those comments regardless of whether you are an aquaintance or own my sister. So I paced a moment and told hubby we needed to head for home before our team's kick-off. We had to make a stop for Lucky Dog food on the way home.

Sister was on her 2nd bottle of wine & her personality starts to change when she's been drinking all day. Usually she's a "holier-than-thou-baptist-bible-quoting-bible-studying-knitting-church-lady-prude" and is offended if I say "sheet". Therefore, when talking with someone using alcohol - I find it useless to verbally stand up for my gay & black friends - I have found instead of talking to my sister, I am really talking to the alcohol and the situation becomes worse. Had she been sober, damn-skippy, I would have had a lot to say to her.

*Gag me with family-dynamics*

Bought our Lucky Dog food; got home, TV on for football, shoes off - - - Ahhhhhh, time to relax.

BUT, my BFF just got back into town from a creative retreat in Blowing Rock, NC [I passed on it due to mom's condition ] She stopped by the house to share the wonderfulness of the retreat and what she had created. Great conversation, spiritually & creatively uplifiting - laced with bubbles of laughter and both of our creative juices flowing!!!

Mr. Wonderful watched the game AND managed to put together snacks & sodas while we chattered on and on and on and on. She left about 11 pm just my son Mark got home so I HAD to stay up & spend time with my him!!!

I know - - - I've not written about mom's condition and have been absent from my blog. Not sure I can "go there" and write about it here. I will have to eventually put my feelings out there on paper, in print, or in my art, but I am scared.